Owl Shitty

Most most obnoxiously wimpy song ever.


The first time I heard this song, I was driving. I didn’t think nothing much of it other then it was annoying. It has a been a couple of months since then and I have no heard this song more times then I would have ever like to.

I remember being in the eight grade and hanging out at my friend Eli’s house and listening to Blink 182 ( we didn’t have enough integrity to even listen to Green Day). Eli’s dad came home from work on his Harley with a six pack of beer. As he was walking to his hydroponics grow operation, he paused and asked the “what the fuck are you guys listening to?” Eli replied, “ Blink 182”. Without skipping a beat, Eli’s dad, stopped the CD, removed from the stereo and quickly broke it in half. He then went on to lecture us about how all new bands are “pussies” and all they sing about is their “broken ass hearts.” He placed in Eli’s hand a Led Zepplin compilation and said, “In my day , bands sung about sex and drugs…and it was good.” From that day forward Eli would only listen to Led Zepplin and later on TOOL, bands Eli’s dad approved. When he heard Queens of the Stone Age on the radio, he was relieved and said “thank god some bands know how to do it right.”

What Eli’s dad experienced walking in on us listening to Blink 182 is how I felt when I heard Owl City’s “Fire Flies.” a song so obnoxiously sensitive and wimpy that my scrotum cowered into my abdomen in an attempt to spare itself of the overwhelming pussitude emitting from the song. There’s nothing wrong with sensitive music, I’m a admittedly a pretty big fan of Belle and Sebastian and Smiths, bands that while sensitive and gentle have something vaguely edgy and interesting going on thematically or musically.

Owl City however, take the Postal Service’s (an inoffensive electro-indie pop ensemble fronted by the ever whiney Ben Gibbard of Death Cab) sound and dress it up with Christian Rockesque, epic worship and praise and crescendo and studio gloss. I have little doubt in my mind that Eli’s uncompromisingly macho dad would hate this song as much as I do and feel compelled to break the radio and kick an ass or two.

I fear that if a generation of young men continue to listen to bands like Owl City and Ben Gibbard they will grow up to spinelss, whiney pussies that can’t look a woman straight in the eyes without getting butterflies…sorry fireflies in their stomach. This dynamic would lead to greater social problems regarding gender roles.

As far as I Know there hasn’t been a truly kick ass mainstream rock band since the Queens of the Stone Age, sadly. Unfortunately newer major label acts like, TV on the Radio never got much radio love outside of college rock stations. It would be nice to hear something new that advocates sex, drugs and rock n roll on the radio but until then ,the Stooge’s “Penetration” seems to be the perfect antidote to all this Ben Gibbard and Ben Gibbard influenced shit.



The perfect antidote.

R.I.P Mark Linkous aka Sparklehorse

It was literally up until this morning. I’m Listening to Vivadixiesubmarine, Sparklehorse’s first album. I’m listening and grieving. Sparklehorse has been one of my favorite bands for sometime now. When I heard that Mark Linkous died, I was shocked yet not surprised, given his history with depression and delicate somber nature of his music. Sparklehorse music was perhaps too idiosyncratic and surreal and sad to ever reach an a larger audience outside of the indie underground, regardless of his affiliation with larger acts such as the Flaming Lips, PJ Harvey, Tom Waits Dangermouse and Radiohead . I am grateful for the records he left behind, each brillians in it’s own way. I feel truly privileged to have seen Sparklehorse in concert, which to this day is the best live show I have ever experienced. I can only hope that his music continues to comfort people and maybe one day gain an much deserved larger audience in the future to come a la Nick Drake.

Ramblin

URGH.

I can sense my quarter-life crisis coming on…My future is uncertain and this is scary. I’m finding it progressively harder get out of bed in the morning. The sight of UNM campus pissed me off fills my head with animosity and rage. I’m pissed off that I’ve accumulated debt getting degree that is fundamentally useless.

Fuck Math

Algebra has become the bane of my existence. I really have been trying to do well at, I go to tutoring for at least a couple hours everyday but continue to confuse my self and makes small mistakes that fuck up everything. I swear that sometimes if I stare at the numbers long enough they get fuzzy and begin to resemble television static.

Fuck Women, Relationships and Dating

Dating seems stupid and pointless. Women my age and older are for the most part and understandably so- attracted to older guys with wealth and status. Guys that are in law school or becoming architects. I could get with girls that are younger but they are usually kind of dumb and uninteresting. They talk about stupid things likes how they were going to buy this one purse but opted to buy another purse instead or how great the Talking Heads are because they just discovered “Once in a lifetime” and are so over the Arcade Fire. I do not have the gumption to listen to that kind of nonsense. Use em for they’re worth I guess.

My options are to become hollow shell of a man and bed dumb girl after dumb girl or become complacent in a relationship with a girl that is possessive, needy and emotionally draining ( Cuz, face most of them are…). Neither of these option strike my fancy.

I’d rather just have a nice casual fling once in while, my biggest fear is having my freedom and independence stripped from me. The cost of being in a relationship seems to outweigh the benefits. No piece of ass, no mater how beautiful or engaging is worth my undivided attention and I’ll be damned if I have some woman tell what I can and can not do.

Fuck Allergies

They’re an inconvenience.

Fuck Mediocre Bands that wear their hearts on their sleeves.

Fuck band like Death Cab for Cutie. Boring and uninteresting. Ben Gibbards’ lyrical complexity more or less on par with the diary scribblings of an unkissed high school virgin. Even Coldplay is edgier then them.

Fuck Movies:

Most of them are too long and too expensive.

Fuck Hipsters

All they do is bitch about other hipsters and talk about books they’ve never even read.

Fuck Bros:

Video games and extreme sports are only cool if you are 12 years old. I'm convinced they spend most their money on energy drinks.

Fuck outspoken Gay People:

People would accept them if they didn’t makes such a big deal out of the fact that they are gay. We get it’s cool.

Fuck Political Activist:

You are nothing more then a walking bumper sticker.

Fuck the Government:

A self-serving mafia.

Fuck the Police:

Let’s give all the High school bullies of the world a gun and authority.

That’s it for now. Guess I’ll keep ramblin.

My favorite Jams of 2009 ( In No Particular Order)

Favorite Jams of 2009

Kurt Vile- God is Saying This to You/ Childish Prodigy

Kurt Vile manages to blend elements of Lo-fi, Acid Folk, Drone and Classic Rock into something that is all his own. Listening to either of these records is like experiencing episode of sleep paralysis. Hazy and cerebral. I'm a huge fan of everything he does.

Cass Mccombs- Catacombs.

This is his most accomplished and ambitious album to date. His songwriting is honest and his production techniques are unique and reveal different qualities with each repeated listen.

Cold Cave- Love Comes First

Amazing lo-fi dark wave electronica with some noisy elements. Love Comes First is easily one of my favorite jams.

Smith Westerns- ST

It’s as if Marc Bolan formed a scrappy teenage garage pop band. Catchy, fun and sexy.

The Hunches- Exit Wounds

The Hunches bury some pretty infectious melodies under layers of noisy and sometimes thrashy garage rock. Not invented is quite possibly my favorite song of the year, “today is not birthday, I was born today.” So good.

The Mantles- ST

The Mantles make psychedelic lo-fi garage rock but what sets them apart from their other Silt breeze contemporaries is they actually know how to play their instruments and write good songs.

Tune Yards- Bird Brains

Creative multi-layered eccentrics female freak folk with tribal elements and lots of howling. This girl recently signed with 4AD. I’m sure she’s going to blow up hug in the next year. Listen to “Sunshine”

Micachu and the Shapes- Jewelery

More eccentric female vocals with angular art punk leanings. Simply AMAZING. Possibly my favorite of any of these albums on this list.

Fever Ray- ST

More creepy sytnh (not really poppy though) from the chick from The Knife. The layered analog production on this record is mesmerizing. Best album to smoke weed to of the year.

Ganglians- Monster Headroom

Another lo-fi band that’s actually talented. They blend psychedelic rock with sunny Beach Boysesque melodies and manage to do a lot with very little. Another good album for a hazy afternoon bud session.

Chain and the Gang- ST

Funky, hip, cool garage rock with brilliant lyrics. Completely underrated. Check out

“Death Bed Confession”

The Clean- Mr. Pop

New Zealand’s seminal indie rockers still have it. Listen to “Are you really on drugs” and “In the dream life you need a rubber soul” easily two of their best songs.

Atlas Sound- Logos

Brafford Cox sophomore records is very ambitious. Easily as good as some of Deerhunter’s best stuff

Julian Lynch- Orange You Glad

More pschedellic lo-fi music. Julian Lynch is headed places. Check out “Andaza”

Almighty Defenders-ST

Drunken doo-wop,soul-funk garage rock from the collective talents of Black Lips and King Khan and BBQ. Ghost with the most is one the most groovy and sexy jams ever.

King Creosote- Flick the Vs

Oddball experimental folk from Scotland with elements of electronic and strangely beautiful lyrics.. Check out “Two Frocks at a Wedding”

Woods-Songs of Shame

Earnest lo-fi pop with wonderful songwriting and lyrics. I thought the lead singer was female for the longest time it turns out he’s actually a dude. A perfect album

The Middle East- Songs of the Middle East

Under heard, epic and sad indie with folk elements. Why this didn’t receive more buzz is beyond me. Absolutely beautiful. Put this on when you are in the company of pretty lady.

Black Lips- 200 Million Thousand

I think this is my favorite album by them. Sleazy, druggy garagerock with good songwriting to boot.

King Khan and BBQ- Invisible Girl

This white boy and Indian have a lot of soul. Their catchy jams go well with a night of debauchery.

Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeroes- Up From Below

One of those records by indie band that sounds like a classic album from two decades ago. A few of the track off this album are the best songs of year. Epic glam rock hippies if that makes any sense.

Antony and Johnsons- Crying Light

More beauty and more sadness from our favorite transgendered eccentric, Antony is one of the best living artists today.

.

Amen Dunes- Dia

Hazy stoner jams. Fucking Great.

Girl-Album

If Elvis Costello was bisexual , smoked weed and listened to 90’s indie rock. You’d have this record.

Cloud Nothings-Turnining On.

Super catchy lo-fi indie pop. I just got this record and I can't stop listening to this record.

Pissed Jeans-King of Jeans

Noisy, cathartic. Good for the gym

The Bitters- Super catchy boy-girl 60's style garage from member's of Canada's Fucked Up.

The Pink Pink-ST

A more bombastic Stone Roses with elements of Primal Scream. Dominoes is one of the best misogynistic songs about being a player ever. Probably my theme song for 09.

Deerhunter-Rainwater Casette Exchange

Proving that Deerhunter aren't just a shoegaze band but capable of writing good pop songs too.

Disappointments of the Year : Fuck these bad records by otherwise good bands.

Grizzly Bear'-Veckaticmist- lame, coma inducing new age shite.

Jay Retard- watch me fall.- Lame

Clipse- Til the Casket Drops.- Lame

All overrated shitgaze and chillwave bands like wavves and Washed Out.

Stability

I'm housesitting for an older more established friend. The house is nice to say the least. It's incredibly spacious, has hard wood floors and a spiral staircase which leads to what is currently being referred to as the "dude room." The dude room is carpeted basement area with electric guitars, amplifiers and a gun safe. Everything is nice and works. It's like staying at a five star hotel or something that requires taking care fat needy cats and one very neurotic dog.

Being here is nice. It gets me in touch with a yearning for stability. Stability is pretty illusive to me. Sometimes i feel like it's just right around the corner and other times i feel like its mostly unattainable. I look foreword to the time in my life where there won't be strange stains on my wall from leaks in the ceilings that deadbeat slumlords refuse to fix. I look foreword to a time where my fridge will be stocked with healthy food and sink will only have a few dirty dishes in it.I look forword to having fat lazy cats lounging on my well designed matching furniture.

But at the moment, I must confess that I am happy despite my lack of stability. I'm not ready to give up aimless nights of successive parties. Mingling with random people and developing shallow acquaintanceships. I like entertaining cheap party girls once in a while, I can't deny it. I'm not ready to give up getting high and talking shit with my friends until 4 am in the morning and the late morning early afternoon coffee sessions that follow. I must admit at the moment. I love this lifestyle.

It is strange growing up and watching your friend grow up. Watching them transition slowly into the more stable lifestyle your just not ready for. The steady girlfriend, the "real world" job that pays well, the closet full of suits. The boring dinner parties and the early bed times.

It's bound to happen eventually, or not. I can still choose a nihilistic and hedonistic lifestyle and chances are no one would stop me. It might be something that makes me happier then my "stable" friends. Of course, just as easily the opposite is also possible.

I'm not worried about it. I'll leave it up to fate and drift foreword and go with flow. I have a good head on my shoulders and things will turn out exactly as they should.

Wilder then the Wild Things

This week was good. In fact this week was excellent. After conquering or at least doing averagely on my last mid-term, I embarked on what would become a five day bender. During five days, much drinking, hash smoking and general hedonism occurred.

- Drunken Monopoly topped off with late night Waffle House invasions. Karanina stole their hot sauce.

- Thursday night, drunken oldies dance parties downtown with the girls.

- Coffee with an ex, topped off with a argument about politics (welfare,crime,social Darwinism).

I told her that her argument was filtered though a white upper middle class place of privilege. Seriously, that chick as no concept of reality. She had nothing left to say and we changed the subject matter to something lighter.

- Lewis and Tyler’ serious rager. Who would of known these guys were capable of a party of that magnitude. Fun, but topped off with drunken girl drama which resolved itself upon sobriety.

-Getting “eighty sixed” from a lesbian party. Silly dykes.

- Where the Wild Things Are with Manan, Greg and Emily. I can’t think of anything good about this movie aside from some visual things. In short in was boring and depressing .It’s “deeper” elements regarding politics, social power, relations ships and divorce came off as heavy handed and failed to move me. I love Dave Eggers and Spike Jonez but this was a creative mess that wasn't even that creative. The monsters came off as spoiled Californian Urbanites wallowing in a self-pity induced quarter life crisis. It wouldn’t be hard to picture some of them sitting at the coffee shop and blogging their Mac book pro. Total waste of time and money.

I would have been better off seeing a cheesy slasher film at the peasant theater. I feel sorry for the kids who went expecting to have a fun time and ended up sitting though a two hour long mope fest.

- Then a pub quiz.

Well, benders may not be healthy I think they are good for the soul once and a while.

Now, I will return to my regularly scheduled life of eating well, working out and doing homework.

Let my spark die out in a brilliant blaze

Ah, midterms are upon us and Albuquerque’s weather is pissing me off. One minute it’s cold and windy the next it hot. Controlling temperature in this apartment equally frustrating, if I leave my window opens it’s cold if I keep it shut I burn up.

The last week was pretty eventful. I saw Brooklyn buzz band Passion Pit who’s brand of Post- Jamiroquai elect- pop left me underwhelmed and made me retreat further into my barricade of lo-fi , garage and punk rock. You know, music with an edge. Don’t get me wrong they have a couple bangers but the fifteen dollar cover was too steep for what I got out of it. Passion Pit are essentially Maroon 5 for Urban Outfitted high school kids and college students who have yet to discover something awesome and real like Pavement or the Stooges… sucks for them. On the plus, I did get to hang out with a cute girl.

This weekend was partytacular. Thursday I went to mediocre “art show” at a nice two story house being rented by some homosexuals hipsters. Christian referred to their house as the “Queen’s castle,” we all had a good laugh about the shitty “art.” I swear these days some people think that just because they were a stupid scarf and do something a little unorthodox with their hair they are some sort avant-garde bohemian wet dream. Yeah dude, your magazine cut out collage work is really challenging and lady, the Polaroids you took of your hipster friends looking particularly quirky are really moving and really raw.. Fuck that shit, some people shouldn’t be allowed to “express” themselves, not at the expense of me having to suffer looking at it.

After that we went to Anodyne and Burt’s and got tremendously drunk. I lost my keys (probably doing something stupid) but got a free lap dance from my sexy stripper friend. Jessi and Rosie gave us a ride back to Jodie’s, where I slept that night. The next morning I drove her “still drunk” ass to court and she bought me breakfast.

After recovering from our respective hangovers, we preceded to go to more parties. After getting drunk yet again we went Manan’s and smoked weed, Me and Christian also had the bright idea to each drink half a bottle of Robotussin which further fucked out shit up but I managed to ride Manan’s bike to my house where I passed out into a blissful slumber.

The night consisted of even more parties, which I shouldn’t have gone to considering the fact I think I may be getting sick..

OH , I'm also kicking ass in school and I got some bitches on the chain, so watch out!